Read the article and answer the questions below:
- According to the article, why do many relationships end even though love is still present?
- What does the author mean by “metabolizing a rupture”?
- Why are small, cumulative ruptures often more dangerous than dramatic conflicts?
- What is the main difference between couples who “bypass” ruptures and those who metabolize them?
- How can rushing into resolution actually harm a relationship?
- Do you agree that “repair is not about making feelings go away quickly, but about making them make sense”? Why or why not?
Glossary
- to fizzle out – to gradually lose energy, strength, or interest until something ends weakly or disappears
- to paper over – to hide, minimize, or try to fix a problem in a superficial way without truly solving it
- rupture – a sudden break, tear, or burst (physical or metaphorical)
- to fracture – to break or crack something; figuratively, to damage or strain a relationship
- containment – the act of keeping something under control or within limits; it can refer to stopping the spread of disease, conflict, or damage
- to reap – to receive or gain something positive as a result of effort or action
- to stem (from) – to originate from; to be caused by
Practice makes perfect
Complete the sentences with the words in bold below.
Make sure the grammatical form of the verbs is correct.
rupture escalate fizzle out reassurance
intent reap intimacy withdraw
1. After the argument, he decided to ………… instead of talking about his feelings.
2. Even a small ………… can damage a relationship if it is not discussed.
3. She tried to give him …………… by saying everything would be okay.
4. The conflict began to ……….. when both partners raised their voices.
5. His …………… was not to hurt her, but his words still had a negative impact.
6. Honest conversations can build deeper ………….. between partners.
7. Their relationship didn’t end in a dramatic fight — it just slowly …………. as they stopped making time for each other and the spark gradually disappeared.
8. After months of honest communication and effort, they finally ………… the benefits of a stronger, more trusting relationship.
Key: 1. withdraw; 2 rupture; 3. reassurance; 4. escalate; 5. intent; 6. intimacy; 7. fizzled out; 8. reaped
Discuss
- The article suggests that relationships rarely fizzle out because of a lack of love. Do you agree?
- The author argues that love initiates connection, but skill determines survival. Do you agree that emotional skills matter more than love in the long term?
- Have you ever experienced a “small rupture” in a relationship that had a bigger impact than expected?
- Do you tend to rush toward resolution in conflict, or avoid it? What usually motivates that reaction?
- Do you see any potential downsides to “delaying closure”? Could it ever become avoidance?
Watch and Revise!
The Secret Skill That Saves Relationships
https://www.cloud.worldwideschool.pl/index.php/s/293eKHbHbynGGmf
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